Clarity

As I sat in front of my computer with large, hot tears streaming down my cheeks, Lee told me something I really needed to hear.

Hayate Kusanagi: I believe in you.

When was the last time someone said that to me? I can't even remember. I'm sure other people think it and feel it, but not many people say it.

He also said this:

Hayate Kusanagi: You remember the shield conversation?
Hayate Kusanagi: It was one of your twisted metaphors. *grins*
Hayate Kusanagi: It was when I wasn't willing to let anyone inside my head.
Hayate Kusanagi: You said simply that if I'd let down my defenses on myself your "shield" would take over.
Hayate Kusanagi: Well think of it like this.
Hayate Kusanagi: In your concern for keeping me safe, you're not defending yourself well. You're so worried about me getting hurt, that you're taking it all.
Hayate Kusanagi: *he smirks* Sweetie, I'm wearing full plate. I can take some abuse. Don't worry about me.

Am I really spending so much time caring for and "protecting" my friends that I'm forgetting that I need care and protection as well? Something to think about before I lull myself to sleep with thoughts of oblivion and darkness.

Music: The Servant - Orchestra
Mood: Numb